I recently started dating one of my longtime friends after she admitted that she had a crush on me.

I was honest and told her I wasn’t really looking for a girlfriend at the time, but now she’s grown distant and started dating other guys. I haven’t been dating anyone else and I’m not a jealous kind of guy, but it sounds like she gave up on me. What do I do? — R.O., Michigan

When you tell someone at the beginning of the relationship that you don’t want anything serious, you can’t be surprised when they explore other options. Since you never indicated that you wanted to take the relationship to the next level, she took her heart elsewhere. Very few women are satisfied with a sex-only relationship for very long. As human beings, we long to be loved and cherished. When you made it clear that she wasn’t going to be getting that affection from you, you shut that door. You can’t blame her for dating other people when you never gave her any indication you wanted more from her. You fucked up. Next time, learn how to communicate your feelings as they develop.

This column doesn’t constitute medical or professional advice. Always consult a qualified health care professional for your medical, psychological, or relationship problems.