I love my boyfriend. We have a lot in common, he’s the sweetest guy in the world, and I couldn’t imagine spending my life with anyone until I met him.

The problem is that I don’t really want to sleep with him. I definitely find him attractive, but just not in that way. What’s wrong with me? Can we make this work? — J.N., Indiana

There’s nothing wrong with you. Who or what turns us on isn’t really something we have control over. Just because something looks great on paper doesn’t mean it will work for you. But it’s really damaging to someone’s self-esteem to be constantly denied sexual contact with their partner.

I’d say let this guy go and find yourself another guy who’s sweet and awesome and who you totally want to bang. Life is too short to not have amazing, loving sex with your primary partner.

This column doesn’t constitute medical or professional advice. Always consult a qualified health care professional for your medical, psychological, or relationship problems.